On our fourth day of celebrating Domestic Discipline, our some-time blogger socialswitch has a story to share about being a sub who believes in paddling. Here’s his story, taken from the pages of hotbottoms.net. Be sure to sign up and share your stories there. We all want to hear from you there too!
CONFESSIONS OF A LIFELONG SPANKEE/SWITCH
by socalswitch
I like to get Spanked. Quite hard, although not with brutality. By men, exclusively. I also like to spank men, but this isn’t about that; I’m (somewhat) predominantly a bottom, although sometimes have the urge to be a top. I’ll post something about that another time. The very idea of getting Spanked or Spanking a woman is out of the question for me. I am not bi, sexually, or with this kink. It is exclusively Male/male for me.
I am married (to a man), which includes this kink on a pretty regular basis (I get Spanked about twice a month or so; the other way around much less often but not never). Our relationship is essentially monogamous, but we do “play” with other guys, usually together but occasionally, usually just because of logistics, separately. Most of these encounters involve us as tops, just because it’s easier when you’re older to find younger guys who want to get Spanked than who want to Spank you.
So anyway, I like to get Spanked, on the bare butt, and often enough that I sometimes seek it outside the couple relationship with honesty and disclosure. Spanking is arousing. It’s sexual, at least for me. Peace to all those who insist they’re only in it for “discipline.” I find that hard to believe or understand, but to each his own. Discipline takes care of itself, and it is part of this thing we share, but Spanking, as fantasy and as practice, is a huge part of what turns me on, makes me tick erotically. But for me, Spanking outside my relationship is just Spanking. That doesn’t mean it isn’t “real,” or doesn’t involve any emotional contact, just that it’s casual, whereas my marriage is a lifetime commitment.
Here’s what works for me. I’m not really into pain, per se. I don’t like to be flogged or whipped on the back, and beyond a few stray smacks, I don’t go for being Spanked or whipped on the legs or thighs either. Spanking is on the butt. (The French call it fesser, which also means the butt, for a reason). I’m not especially turned on by shared fantasy and role play, such as naughty student getting paddled, or whatever. I can be flexible, and have a fair amount of experience with this kind of acting out, but that’s not the focus, for me, and scenes where it’s mostly drama and only pretend action, without honest to goodness butt whacking don’t work for me at all.
I can and do take a very long and hard Spanking, but I really need to have a warm-up, usually in the form of a quite hard, relatively long, spanking with bare hand, with my pants down (not necessarily off), on bare butt, with me OTK. I can usually take almost any level of hand-Spanking, fast and hard, right out of the box (with occasional exceptions; there are men who can Spank so hard with their bare hands that I need a warm up before getting even to that; but that’s not usual).
Anyway I can’t and don’t enjoy going straight to paddling hard without a warm-up. This can be scene-killer for me. I think I understand the reasons for this pretty well (after over 35 years of experience, you get to know yourself and find out a thing or two about how it works). Most guys know this, anyway: Spanking, beyond a certain level of intensity, and varying from guy to guy, causes the release of endorphins, which enable you to experience the stimulus and other aspects, and plenty of the pain, but not so much that you just want to get the hell out of there.
After getting Spanked, pretty hard, by hand, for five or ten minutes or more; it’s time for a break. I like it preferably fairly continuously and steadily; I’m not jazzed by a Spank, feel, feel, feel, feel, Spank rhythm. Spanking should be spanking, and it should be pretty hard and pretty fast… taking into account that if you’re going to do it for a long time, you have to keep it to a certain level, to have room for it to get harder at the end. Mainly there should be some fairly steady rhythm to it. Not everyone agrees, but for me this is actually very important. After getting spanked OTK by hand like this, a break is essential. Corner time is totally boring to me, but if that’s a guy’s thing, I have done it, and it does serve the purpose. For some guys it’s very important, so you try to be accommodating. But what’s important is a break. At least ten minutes.To let the feeling sink in and the body do its magical thing.
Then the Spanking can resume, and get much more intense. I like OTK positions best, or better, kind of angled OTK, Spanker seated on couch or bed. Or, it can also be really hot to have a standing OTK, but that requires a good deal of balance. Or top standing, with arm around torso and the spanked bent over (this is not “touch your toes;” it’s more intimate).
“I like to be Spanked with a paddle. Not given a series of school swats. A little of that is OK, but what really gets me going is continuous, moderate intensity Spanking, with bursts of speed and intensity; punctuated by short breaks, at the discretion of the Spanker.“
Not too much dialogue; not an elaborate punishment scenario with lots of lecturing and feedback. (Look, I deserve it, I need it, so why do we have to talk about it?). No counting swats. I just don’t like it. Some guys do, I don’t. No promising to be a good boy. (OK, a little of any of these, but not too much).I also get into to being Spanked with The Hairbrush.We all have our preferences.
All of these implements have to be controlled… the goal is to Spank thoroughly and long, leaving a very, very red butt, but not to break the skin. Again, a little of that is OK, but not huge weeping sores. I’ve been there and done that, and, frankly, it’s too inconvenient to be worth it. Very young or inexperienced guys will get weepy sores from even a moderately hard Spanking, and to some extent that’s the initiation they just have to go through before their butts toughen up to where they can “take” a hard Spanking without damage (which invariably happens).
A skillful Spanker can Spank the crap out of an experienced bottom for a long time, again, hard but not brutal, without doing that kind of damage. Here’s a newsflash (for some): Spanking hurts. I squirm. I cry a little (not tears, but involuntary crying, or low howling (not screaming). I am more verbal than some. And there are times during my Spanking when I really, really wish it was over. But that, in fact, is what I want, to really get it, lose the control and have to take it. In fact, although some guys my age have definitely slowed down, or switched to being exclusively tops, if I don’t get a good hard Spanking at least once a week, I start to get antsy.
A big thank you to socialswitch for his insights about how paddlings work for him. Let us know your thoughts about paddling too! Just comment below!
Cornertime Confidential 